Going gray with your hair is one aspect of aging that some women dislike, while others are eager to embrace their silver strands. While there's no "right way" to age, it can be incredibly empowering to welcome this change.
For Mary Rademacher, a West Michigan woman and national touring vocal performer, going gray was something her mother, Pat, had always talked about doing—and did—once she turned 60.
"Her hair ended up being a beautiful, wavy snow white, and so much healthier than it had been in all the years of her dying her own hair," Rademacher recalled. "My sister and I both hoped we would inherit that gene."
As Rademacher approached 60 herself, she'd toyed with the idea of going gray, fully committing once the COVID-19 pandemic began.
"My hair was so dark, that the upkeep on my roots had turned into every two to three weeks, so it wasn't really about saving money, as I usually did it myself, but more about convenience ... and acceptance," she said. "I kind of joined the bandwagon with a lot of other women who went gray during that time and it was a fun journey to watch all of us together."
There was a moment when Rademacher's sister and her friends encouraged her to keep her darker hair, but her mind was already made up.
"I just laughed and said I was going to go through with it and if I changed my mind I could always go back—I was really committed to totally growing it out," Rademacher said. "Why mask it or spend money to alter it when I really wanted to see what was under there and witness the transformation? So I let it grow for months and had the awful 'half and half,' but then cut it off until it was a pixie and let it grow out from there again."
For Rademacher, rocking her natural gray hair—and even deciding to grow it longer than her hair was before—feels great.
"I absolutely love my gray hair! I am blessed to have beautiful, healthy curly hair and that didn't change when it grew out thankfully, which I was apprehensive about," she said. "Yes, there are still days—moments, really—that I miss my dark hair, but there's really no reason to go back. This is me!"
Rademacher says she's not trying to prove that she's younger or needs dark hair to be youthful or beautiful.
"I am just right the way I am," she proudly declared. "I've added purple or pink highlights occasionally, which are super fun to me. And, I throw on a fun wig now and then when I perform just for fun, too. Why not?! With age comes an 'I-don't-care' attitude. It's freeing, really."
When it comes to making the choice to go with the gray, Rademacher stresses that it's a personal choice. If you're among the women considering it, she advises to try it if it feels good, but change it if it doesn't!
"Although many women have made the transition to gray, not everyone's ready for it and I hold no judgment," Rademacher said. "There is a certain sisterhood and camaraderie among women who have gone gray and it's fun to share that. I've gotten so many compliments from young and old, men and women.
"But it comes down to just being my true self. It feels good to me. And that's enough."
Written by Sarah Suydam, Managing Editor for West Michigan Woman.
This article originally appeared in the Aug/Sep '24 issue of West Michigan Woman.
Photo courtesy of Mary Rademacher.
