Divorce: Presence

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I am a very impatient person at times. In fact, I often resemble a child at Christmas who cannot wait for Christmas morning, and tear through the wrapping paper to unveil my presents. I’m not sure how I got this way and I know I’m not alone in constantly looking ahead to that point of accomplishment, only to forget to enjoy the journey. 

Something I was guilty of, while married, was not living in the moment. I would consume myself with thoughts about work, friends, family, and other things instead of living my life in each wonderful minute. I was waiting until the next big accomplishment or next fun material purchase, in order to enjoy myself. I think as Americans, we program ourselves this way and it ends up contributing to a lifetime of disappointments, distractions, negative thoughts, and delays the happiness we all deserve. It also takes away from the time we spend with those incredible people in our lives.

It can also be painful living in a present mind-set. It forces us to be completely aware of the negative aspects of our lives, and can make us uncomfortable. The majority of us runaround, mentally checked out, to avoid confronting the area of our lives which isn’t so pretty. It is only when we confront those truths that we may continue to evolve and move in the direction of correcting our mindset, behaviors, and open ourselves up to living a happy, authentic life.

Now, I start each day listing everything in my life I am grateful for. I also commit to practicing presence (something my therapist taught me). I pay attention on the drive to work. I live in each moment and don’t consume my mind with other thoughts. I take time to pay attention those I love in every moment we share. I’m not on this earth for very long. None of us are. 

This holiday season, practice presence. Enjoy every moment for what it is, and be completely aware of your surroundings. Take an active role each day and what it offers. You may be surprised that right now is really great!

Be strong and live well.

Blog-Jessica HollandWritten by: Jessica Holland is a guest blogger for West Michigan Woman. This is her series of blogs related to her firsthand experience with divorce and the lifestyle change that comes with it. Click here to read other blogs in her series, and check back weekly for her perspectives and advice!


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