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Authentic Self

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Megan Sall of The Right Place, Inc. lit up the room at the March Grand Rapids Chamber of Commerce's ATHENA Leadership Forum, with her personal and humorous take on the tenet of Fierce Advocacy. Beyond that, we wanted to chat with Megan about the related Authentic Self tenet and being—in her words— "picky-choosy." Here, Megan shares her insights and advice for living personally and professionally as the truest version of you.

How do you live out the Authentic Self ATHENA tenet?
Authentic Self is all about understanding who we are as individuals, embracing that, and owning how we choose to live that out. I feel like I'm in a constant state of discovering who I am, what I'm about, and who I want to be. A big part of that is also discovering who I'm not and what I'm not about, which can be just as difficult to identify ... and difficult to accept.

I'm always thinking that I need to be awesome at everything—that as a modern, independent woman I should do well at work, take care of family and friends, eat healthy, work-out, stay active with the community, and have a thousand hobbies on top of that. On a good day, I might succeed at a couple of those objectives. But most days, it's more about survival!

And don't even get me started about hobbies. Crafting, cooking, underwater basket-weaving—my Facebook feed is full of fabulously gifted friends/family doing these kinds of things. And I think they're all amazing. But at this point in my life, I've realized that none of those things are my forte, and that's okay!

I'm learning to recognize strengths and weaknesses, come to peace with those realizations, and then work out the implications in my personal and professional life. I know I'll be at my best when I'm just me, and not a person I think I should be.

How has living out this tenet affected your career?
Understanding who I am and what I'm about has been extremely helpful as I try to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. Prior to moving back to Grand Rapids, I was working in D.C. as a subcontractor on a USAID project. The work was really interesting—we were implementing projects in Afghanistan—but most of the people I was working with were overseas, and I spent a lot of time in my cube. I'm very aware that I'm an extreme extrovert, and I need to be with people—connecting, partnering, sharing ideas, et cetera. So despite the fact that I'd be leaving D.C. and a very unique project, when the opportunity to work for The Right Place opened up, I just had to apply, as I knew it would be a much better fit.

What advice would you offer to someone who seems unsure of who he or she is?
First of all, take a deep breath and don't freak out. I don't think we're ever going to wake up and know exactly who we are, despite our best efforts. It requires time, patience, and a lot of self-compassion. Ask yourself some questions:
• What do I love and have a passion for?
• What characteristics do I admire most in others?
• What could I be happy thinking or talking about all day long?
• And conversely, what activity or subject puts an instant frown on my face?
• What doesn't get me out of bed in the morning?

Make a point of engaging the help of others. Whether from friends, family, or professionals, ask for advice, input, and observations. What do they see you loving, enjoying, detesting, et cetera? What character traits or skills do they see and admire in you? Take those answers to heart, but make sure to reconcile them with your own thoughts. Don't let others define you. The point of Authentic Self is understanding who you are, not the "you" your parents, significant other, boss, or friends want or tell you to be. Easier said than done, I know. I've spent far too many years of my life living for others, doing the things I thought would help me fit in, succeed, feel better about myself, et cetera.

How does Authentic Self help you through life's struggles and challenges?
Authentic Self helps me identify which things in life should really be a struggle or a challenge. As women, I think we get hung up on all sorts of things that have nothing to do with who we really are. We let others' perceptions and abilities make us feel inadequate, and we can't help but play the comparison game. Who cares if so-and-so bakes more cookies, bills more hours, keeps their house cleaner, or loves abandoned Persian cats more than you? If baking cookies, billing hours, cleaning the house, or loving Persian cats are none of the things that make you "you," then it doesn't matter and there's no use worrying about it. And if they are a part of you, use others' examples as motivation, not reason to get sucked into the shame spiral.

I think we all need to learn to be picky-choosy. Let's pick the things that make our hearts and souls the happiest, and choose to commit and see them through. Let's be purposeful about our time and efforts, and not run amuck from one thing to the next, all the while canceling, rescheduling, and feeling behind about everything in between. Let's set manageable goals and schedules for ourselves, and then use the rest of our time to sleep, eat and drink well, spend time with our family and friends.

How does developing your Authentic Self help you assist others as they discover themselves and learn to thrive?
If you understand who you are, and you've been through the process of figuring that out, you can better direct others through their own journey of discovering Authentic Self.

Why do you support the ATHENA program?
ATHENA is an amazing program that provides women with the resources to realize their potential—personally and professionally. I love the community of women (and men, too!) that support each other through this program. It's a phenomenal group to be a part of.

If you could have a superpower, what would it be?
If I could have a superpower, it would probably be omnipresence. There are so many incredible people doing wonderful things in Grand Rapids these days, and I wish I could support all of the efforts and be a part of everything that's going on! But only the things that relate to my Authentic Self, of course ...

As Megan would have it, go ahead and be "picky-choosy" with your life. You only get one, so live it to the fullest by being the best, truest, version of you. By filling our time and lives with the passions, interests, and people who make us feel happy and content, we're able to nourish that part of us that thrives off of positivity and, as a result, are able to give back to those around us. Be you. Be true. Do what makes you happy.

We invite you to join the Grand Rapids Chamber of Commerce on August 21 at Kent Country Club for the annual ATHENA Leadership Forum & Scholarship Fundraiser, which supports local women who are being true to themselves by following their passions and returning to school for a higher education. The ATHENA Scholarship uniquely provides unrestricted financial aid to women over thirty. The scholarship funds can be used at any accredited college or university for whatever expenses best fit the recipients' needs—whether tuition and books or transportation and childcare. Visit www.grandrapids.org/athena-leadership-forum to learn more.

Contributed by: Mercedes Cowper is program & events coordinator for the Grand Rapids Area Chamber of Commerce. Edited by: AliciaMarie Belchak is communications specialist for the Grand Rapids Area Chamber of Commerce.

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