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Divorce: Budgeting for the Holidays

Thursday, 05 December 2013 05:29
It’s that time of year when we all start shopping for Christmas presents for family and friends. It’s a wonderful time to reflect on the relationships we have and give selflessly to those we love. I really like this time of year, but as of last year, I had to set a concrete budget. I don’t have the kind of income I once did as a married woman. Now, on a single income, I have to watch what I spend and be OK with not overdoing the gift giving. At first, I felt guilty for not being able to afford… Read more...

Giving Thanks EVERY Day

Tuesday, 26 November 2013 06:08
Thanksgiving. Does it have a different meaning for everyone? Does everyone give thanks on this holiday? I would bet not, although I wish that was not true. What I do think is that it is important to recognize what you are thankful for in your life every day, not just on Thanksgiving. Everyone has problems; everyone has something in their life they wish they could change. Maybe we should just seek out at least one good thing in our lives and be thankful for it, EVERY DAY! Life is short and unpredictable. It can be taken away from you in… Read more...

Divorce: My Closet

Thursday, 14 November 2013 04:10
A year and a half has gone by since my decision to venture out on my own and build a new life. Throughout the journey, I have learned so much about who I am on the inside, and who I desire to be for my son, family, friends, and my career. Naturally, this inward reflection prompted me to look at my outward appearance and uncover what this new woman should look like. My newfound style would showcase what I discovered about myself once I chiseled away the exterior I had lived with as a married woman. I wasn’t sure what… Read more...

Divorce: Letting Go

Wednesday, 06 November 2013 09:41
Someone very near and dear to me recently told me that we are all damaged goods. My first reaction was sheer disbelief, and I wanted to challenge that theory. However, the more we discussed this topic, the more I realized he was right. Think about it: All of us have a past and have dealt with hurtful experiences. Most of us over the age of twenty-one have had our fair share of positive and negative things that have either knocked us down emotionally or lifted us up. These experiences have shaped our personal view of ourselves, others, and the world.… Read more...

Divorce: Retreat

Wednesday, 30 October 2013 10:34
Everyone goes through tough times. Life can be a rollercoaster of emotions, and managing it can be a lot like walking through a hillside filled with land mines. On top of the daily challenges life presents, throw in a traumatic divorce. I don’t think anyone can prepare themselves for the crazy, out-of-control, bipolar-like emotions of managing through a divorce. I thought I was the exception. Fast forward to four months after my separation. It was the beginning of November 2012, and everything I thought I “had together” seemed to crumble in my hands. Work was challenging at the time. The… Read more...

First-Time Aunt

Monday, 28 October 2013 09:26
I am not pregnant and do not have any children. But as of recently, it is a topic that I think about almost everyday. I feel like everywhere I go a woman is pregnant, or I’m hearing of a close friend trying to get pregnant, or there are kids running around. I am often asked if my husband and I have children, and I always answer with a “not yet, maybe one day” answer. The majority of my close friends have all had at least one child so far, and for the most part have all had them in their… Read more...

Divorce: To Date or Not to Date

Thursday, 24 October 2013 04:10
I was twenty-one years old when I met my ex-husband. He proposed to me after dating for three months, and we tied the knot a year later. I conformed to what many young Midwestern women did, by graduating college and running to the altar.  I had a somewhat limited dating history before I met my ex-husband. I had two serious high school boyfriends. That was about it. Now, at age thirty-four, in the new age of social media and technology at our fingertips, I entered the dating scene … GULP. I was mortified and petrified to “date after divorce.” My… Read more...

Divorce: The Children

Thursday, 17 October 2013 03:46
My little boy was only four and a half years old when his father and I separated. It was important to both of us to show civility and cooperation in front of our son, despite the emotional turmoil of the separation. For the first month or two, we moved him back and forth between us, trying to each get enough time with him and also show that we could be respectful of each other’s time with him. Looking back, we had no idea what we were doing.  I now understand what we did wrong and how this schedule neglected to… Read more...

Divorce: Now What?

Tuesday, 08 October 2013 04:26
I remember sitting in my new residence all by myself (a 1970s townhouse, by-the-way), when all of the sudden panic set in … What the H*&!# had I done?! I had moved out and filed the divorce papers. My mother and sister, who were helping me transition, had gone home to their respective states. Except for having my precious son (on my days), I was on my own. So, I did what any person would do: I looked around my new apartment and cleaned like a mad woman. I did laundry, vacuumed, and rearranged things until I was exhausted. After… Read more...

Divorce: Decision Day

Thursday, 03 October 2013 05:16
I am divorced. It’s not easy to say out loud or put it in writing. However, as of January 23, 2013, I became a divorced single mother. How I got there was a culmination of years of unhappiness and unhealthy choices for both of us. You may have found yourself in the same place, or wondering if you should make a choice similar to mine. I had been in therapy for more than three years to fix my marriage or make the final choice to let go and move on. I always wanted to be a wife and mother. The… Read more...

 

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